Back to Attack


I've moved to London, I've settled in and I'm ready to rock. What's good, my name is Maddi and I am here once more to grace your lives with my written finesse. So far this year has been ridiculous, and although there was a little while there when I got into a routine and had a full time job, I don't feel as though I've really had any time at all to stop and collect myself. As a result, I don't think my brain has been completely clear since January, and although that still hasn't changed I'm going to stop waiting for it to. Yes, I may need to find myself an ocean to stare pensively out at in the very, very near future in order to avoid complete emotional and mental collapse, but for now it's time to grow up and get on with business. Not literally business, because I'm still very much giving myself a little breather from employment to sort out my life, but the business of reclaiming my life after the game of emotional pinball that has been the past seven months. 

In the time that I've been gone I experienced a grand emotional milestone and finally befriended Jedward in person after several years of anticipation. I know, I'm proud of me too. I also went to Summer In The City and met a LOT of you, which was just as surreal as always and acted as a beacon of joy and light shining through what was indeed a rawther monumental hangover. Speaking of which, up until the last two days I had not stopped since we moved to London, and in running around trying to see as many people as possible I have discovered an extraordinarily social side of myself that I was not aware existed. As a very shy and introverted little darling* (ordered takeout tonight because I straight up couldn't be bothered socialising with our housemates long enough to cook) I've always needed a lot of down time to decompress, but those three weeks of non stop socialising were the happiest I've been in ages. 
This is what I moved for, and it's exactly how I wanted it to be.

I've been saying for months that thinking about Melbourne and Reading was like comparing two different lives, and I loved my life in Melbourne so honestly that's not a great thing. However, moving to London has been one massive step towards regaining a bit of normalcy and now I'm ready to start reintroducing bits of my normal life into my present. It is going to take a conscious effort to try and knock my brain back into regular function, but it'll happen eventually. For now, I'm just going to adopt my favourite philosophy of Fake It Til Ya Make It and gradually remember how to feel and act like my Peak Self.**

I hope you have all thus far enjoyed joining me sporadically throughout this year of neverending crises, and may we all soon ease back into a life of my effortless genius and charm.

Check ya x0x0


*My mother called me a shy little darling once and I laughed at her but she was correct. I just also happen to thrive on constant attention and praise.
**Full disclosure a lot of my planned steps are things like 'buy a juicer' and 'go to Italy more' so probs need a job soon.