In my 22 years as a very emotional person on this earth I have concluded that there are two main types of sadness: the kind that demands to be felt, and the kind that just needs its time to exist. There's no clear-cut way to tell between the two, but you'll know what you're feeling, and tonight I am having a solid wave of the latter. It's nothing terrible, nothing immediate, nothing related to boys for once in my dang life - but it is something that I am going to have to deal with whether I want to or not, and since I've realised that falling asleep just isn't on the cards right now I thought I might as well adapt to the situation and ride it out. So here is my mini battle strategy for how to allow yourself to feel sad at night without crying yourself to sleep.
1. Acknowledge it.
I did a little bit of night-crying, as one must when one's heart demands it, but overall I'm just not about the sob life right now so I made the conscious decision to allow myself to be sad without turning it into a drama. Plus the more worked up you get the harder it is to sleep. Unless you weep yourself into a coma but that only really works with the first kind of sadness, so very sorry about that.
2. Burst the bubble.
Make a change to separate yourself from that emotional state. If you're lying in the dark feeling sorry for yourself, turn on the light. Great advice for life all around, but right now we're talking in a literal sense. I personally need to wake up in six hours but I know that light on or off I'm not about to fall asleep until I sort myself out so might as well get cracking.
3. Comforting beverages.
I have opted for an 'evening blend' of tea, but if we're being honest I do feel some warm milk and honey on the horizon. Warm beverages make you feel better. It's science. From my brain. However if you have another specific drink that makes you feel comforted (fun fact I always drink apple juice when I'm sad on planes) then go for that.
4. Comforting ambiance.
Candles. This is always going to mean candles. I've got my amber & moss one going now because it is a very warm, musky scent that reminds me of my mother and also it is nearest to my bed.
5. Literally anything else comforting you can think of.
My first instinct was to get every single one of my stuffed animals and dump them on my bed and so that is what I have done.
6. Cocoon yourself.
Swaddle yourself like a tiny, tiny baby.
7. Comforting entertainment.
Pick a movie you have seen a hundred times that makes you feel safe and happy and put it on. I am typing this very quickly so that I may begin Night At The Museum. This is not the time for new experiences, because the ultimate goal is to get yourself to a state where you can fall asleep, and that's less likely to happen if you're concentrating on a new storyline.
8. Settle in and let things run their course.
Don't focus on the thing that's making you sad, don't stress yourself out about getting to sleep, just watch the movie and drink your beverage and smother yourself in a mountain of stuffed animals. As year-8-emo-meets-struggling-poet as it sounds, there is something oddly comforting about being a little bit sad, so you might just be surprised how quickly you feel ready to sleep. And if not, you get to watch a great movie and have some juice, so either way it's a win.
Happy sadding.
Good night xo
